Brenda: Naah... Julie: You have to be able to tell if, you know, you're in a relationship, communication is, like, the most vital vital vital thing! Brenda: Yep, yep, yep.
Ester: I think we talked about this, what, in October?
Julie: Yes, before she went on the trip.
Ester: And you're back already! *laughs* Brenda: I'm back! Ester: and then... is there any progress?
Julie: That's what, October, November, December, January, February... 5 months already, and we're going... Ester: ... any progress? Brenda: No, well... that's how we, I, I tried to bring it up. Then, he never gave me a clear answer. It was always ohh, umm, "however long it takes". Julie: What's "however long it takes?" Brenda: How, like, I asked, I came out and asked him! I did! I said "How long do you think we can keep doing this?" and his response was "however long it takes!". So, I can't get a clear, or how do I get a clear answer from him? I don't wanna push him too much either. You know... Julie: He's being ambiguous. He's, like, sitting on the fence! Brenda: But I know he does want to be together. I know that. But I don't know if he wants to... Julie: Get married... and have... all that. Brenda: Get married and all that, and I don't know how to ask that - and it makes me nervous. Cos, like, you know, even though, it is something... it's what I want. I want, you know, to get married and all that, and, yes, with him. But, I don't wanna. I don't want it straight away. I don't want it, like, next year or this year or, you know, I want it when it's ready. When we're ready. Julie: Have you asked him if he can see him with you? or you with him in other words? As in, settle down, with kids?
Brenda: Yeah, we, umm... like we've spoken about future things, like. Julie: But, as in, is he talking, okay, when "I" get maried, or is he saying, or when "we" get married? Brenda: No. Marriage is never brought up!
Julie: Okay.
Brenda: But like, when we live together, we're going to get this, or we're going to get that, or we're going to get the... or we have plans already, we're going to have two dogs. So... Julie: It doesn't... that's... that's progress, right? Brenda: But, see, this, that talk was probably last... early last year.
Julie: Ah.
Brenda: So it's been ages since we've had talks like that. Julie: I can remember... Brenda: I told you about that conversation we had at the restaurant? About him, like, he goes... Julie: About him not paying? Brenda: Na, na... that he, yeah. That, when we were talking about (the) future thing - he's like, oh yeah, you know. Umm, I remember you were talking about if we had a catering company or whatever. He goes... Julie: oh yeah. Brenda: ...if I had a restaurant, you would work there. I'm like, I think of it as we would "own" something together. Ester: Yep.
Brenda: While he still thinks of it as "we" separately. I would work for him, and, I'm like, "I would work for you?" Julie: Is that... are we mistaking maturity for something else here? A guy who's immature... they don't realise... Esther: I think he's not ready. I think he's not ready. He has all these financial issues. I think he's not ready. Brenda: That's one thing. That's the main thing that I'm worried about. He's... financially, he's not stable right now. Esther: He's not ready. Roy: How old is he?
